The World That's Inside My Head: Poppin corn!

It's been a weird couple of days.

Click on the thing above this text, and listen to the 19 second sound clip.

Then, imagine that, in a small room, for 25 minutes. Non stop.

That's all I really remember from Monday at work. Near the end of the day, this kid who we'll call George, doesn't want to go to swim lessons.

So we take him to the pool anyway like we are supposed to, and he starts to do that.

And he won't stop.

He refuses to get in the pool, and so after much fussing he is taken back to the main room where he still won't stop crying.*

After a few minutes, he is such a distraction that he can't be around the other kids anymore.

So I take him to a different room with an older kid, and we try to calm him down.

Absolutely nothing works, and eventually we have to call his parents to pick him up asap.

I ask two of the kids "Would you guys work here for 8.55 an hour?"

They look at each other, look back at me, and in unison answer "NO."

It was not the best Monday at work.

*He never actually produced tears. What you heard in that audio clip was it, if you looked at him it looks like he's crying because of his facial expression. But I assure you, he was just freaking out for no reason and was no actually crying.

Remember the speeding ticket I told you about?

I came home on Monday and my Dad still hadn't heard about it.

So I walk up and spill it all at once.

"Hey Dad. I got a 300 dollar speeding ticket last night."

He talks casually for a few seconds, and then works himself into a sort of hissy fit and the conversation ends with him saying "If you get another ticket, I'm selling that piece of shit and buy you a junker and you will like it. Now get the hell away from me so I can calm down."

It was not the best Monday at home.

From home I went to Kaden's. The mood was thick with despair, as soon we would be travelling to the vet to put down Pumpkin, the Mathis family cat of 19 years who lived to be 22.

I kinda liked that cat. She had a funny habit of walking into a room full of people, wobbling over to me, and sneezing on whatever body part she could find.

On more than a few occasions, I would bow my head to her level, and she would do a sort of head but that looked pretty cool. Then she would usually sneeze in my hair.

Kaden's mom said it best when she described Pumpkin's meows: "She has one noise, and one volume level."

If you have ever been to Kaden's for an extended period of time, you have probably heard a random yet extremely loud "MAAAOOOWWWWWWWW" that is probably repeated several times and ended with a strangely human sounding sneeze.

Last night a few of us gathered in a small exam room at the Vet place near Sonic, and watched as Pumpkin slowly and peacefully drifted off.

It was not the best Monday.

The early morning hours of Tuesday were spent reading about how I can modify my exhaust system on my car so it is back to legal status. This was followed by sleep until around 11.

Woke up, showered, went to work, went to Carmike.

A few weeks ago my mother and sister made me promise I would see Toy Story 3 with them. So today we finally did. We were 3 of 7 people in the theater.

Yea, it was like the greatest movie ever. Kind of perfect.

I thought it was really cool how we, as a generation, more or less grew up with that series. It kind of made me want to dig my Buzz Lightyear out of the attic.

From the theater I went to Kaden's where I had some fun on the telephone.

The situation is: My exhaust system is illegal because it is too loud. The system is aftermarket and cost over 600 dollars to the previous owner. Naturally, I don't want to have to replace it all.

So, my question was do I have to replace it all, or just the muffler?

To me, it seems like a reasonable enough question. Apparently it wasn't.

I call the Richland Police Department. I ask them.

The lady on the phone replies with a confused "Uhm... Did you get your ticket in Richland?"

No, I got it in West.

"Well you have to call West Richland PD then."

Click.

Hokay, correct me if I'm wrong: I violated a Washington State law. Richland is in Washington. Why does it matter where in Washington I got the ticket? I'm relatively confident the laws concerning exhaust systems are quite similar from Richland to West Richland.

So I call West Richland PD.

They have no clue, and connect me to an on duty officer.

They have no clue, and connect me to the state patrol office.

Shocker: They have no clue. They tell me to ask a mechanic.

So, a random mechanic is supposed to know more about Washington State law than the state patrol office?

After calling those 4 places, I give up for the moment and head to Midas in Kennewick.

All said and done, a new muffler is going to be about $150.

So right now, absolute worst case scenario is 150+309= $459.

fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Then I got hungry.

We met up with Mick, Tyson, Gareth, and Brenna at Wing Stop for some delicious foods, and then went to My Fro Yo for some Fro Yo.... yo.

I didn't hear about this place until Sunday.

Tyson said to me "We should go to my fro yo."

Confusion takes me over. I think he's inviting me to some sort of hair party.

After a brief explanation, it sounds like a cool place.

When I got there today, I was a bit overwhelmed. I wasn't sure if I want to go for a chocolatey or a fruity concoction.

So I did both in the same cup.

Didn't turn out to well.... But I think next time it will be rather enjoyable.

Anyone care to take a guess as to where we went following this?

Yup. From about 8 until 11 I was in the Alberton's parking lot hanging out with random groups of people.

At around 10:30, the manager came out and started shooting angry looks at everyone.

So, being the diplomatic/to the point guy I am, I walk up and ask "Do you want us to leave?"

He doesn't give me a straight answer. He goes on some rant about kids pushing carts into cars, I don't follow it at all and I say "Okay I'll ask them to leave."

He was rather unpleasant about the entire thing. As we all enter our cars to travel from the Albertson's parking lot the parking lot of the sports complex on Keene, I drive by him, roll down my window and say "Have a good night!" and wave.

He looks me in the eye and ignores it.

I sort of wonder why I bother being diplomatic or respectful or whatever. It rarely works in my favor.

Finally there are about 17 cars and roughly 30 people in the parking lot on Keene.

We aren't doing much, and the inevitable occurs: A police cruiser pulls in the parking lot.

He approaches slowly and asks "Are you guys drinking?"

We say no.

He says "Well, park is closed. I'm not really going to sweat it if you guys aren't drinking."

And then he takes off, driving rather unsafely but entertainingly.

The general consensus after this was "Wow, not all cops are complete assholes."

Finally I call it a night.

Driving by the Albertsons parking lot, I see two cops parked next to each other not doing anything.

I remember my question, and drive up to them to give it one last shot.

The first has no clue.

Thankfully, my sanity was kept in tact due to the second officer informing me that replacing the muffler (like the mechanic told me to do) should be fine.

Tomorrow I plan to mail my ticket in requesting a court date.

Bring it on fools.

Tuesday was not the worst.